I Heart The Beautiful Bastard

I mentioned in last week's Saturday Sparklers that I just started reading the fan fic piece The Office by tby789. What I should have said is that I love every single, lemon-filled word of it and basically want to be transported into the story in the role of Bella.

I want to be you. Badly.

The Office is panty melting HOT. A delicious, mouth-watering lemon waits for you in every chapter. Edward Cullen is a bastard, and Bella is a bit of a bitch, and when that bursts into passion filled, mind blowing sex sessions, my oh my. Panties, puddle on the floor.

Is this proper work attire? It is if you want your hot boss to screw you on the conference table.

And if the amazing sex scenes weren't enough, The Office is actually really well written. Really well. The story is fantastic. I won't give anything away, because you should go read it yourself, and I don't want to spoil all the excellence for you (hey, I might not be pure about everything, but I won't spoil a perfectly good, smutty piece of fanfic for you). The flip flop chapters between Edward and Bella's POVs add even more to the story, because getting to see both sides of this story? Excellent, indeed.

Let us end with this: this is the person you can be thinking about while you reading all the smuttastic chapters. A tasty end thought, no? You're welcome.

Hello ladies. I'm looking for an assistant. Anyone interested?

I know that tby789 already has a big following, so perhaps you have already started reading The Office and are anxiously awaiting new chapters. But if you haven't, you must read The Office. You can thank me later.

Saturday Sparklers

In case you missed them:

The Twitards are drowning in Edwards, Mini and not so Mini.

TwiSessed reviews Twilight (the movie ) and converts a Team Jacob member (maybe there's hope for my former friend.)

Cutie from Super Secret Twilight Blog guest posted for Tasha (one of our absolute favorites here at TwidiculousWives) over at Something Less Productive, and let me tell you: hi-lar-i-ous. And may just make you, ahem, notice Emmett. And his dimples. *swoon*

And it's come to my attention that not everyone has read Wide Awake (cough, QP, cough). The best f'ing piece of fanfic ever. Go. Read. Or we maybe can't be friends anymore.

And what's this? A little celebrity stalking never hurt anyone. Check out what Moon over at Letter's to Twilight saw....

Jacksper and a Fanfic Recommendation

I won't lie. I kinda have a thing for Jackson/Jasper. Don't get me wrong, I love me some/frequently fantasize about Rob/Edward, but there's something about skinny musician-actors/vampires that try so hard to be good but can't resist the urge to lung at you with blood lust.

Need more Jasper? Read this fanfic: South. Not smutty, but angsty and good.

Need more Jackson? Check out more photos here.

How Will I Find Time For Work?

For those of you who don’t know, I am a teacher. Yes, I am a shaper of young (ages three-to-five years-old, to be exact) minds. Being that school is out for the summer, I have A LOT of free time to spend doing various Twilight-related activities. What kind of activities, you ask? I would be happy to share a few:

1.) (Re)reading Twilight. And New Moon. And Eclipse. And Breaking Dawn. And Midnight Sun.

2.) Spending endless hours engrossed in Fan Fiction (Are you reading Wide Awake, BTW? If so, you must go and join Cutie at Super Secret Twilight Blog’s discussion this Friday over Chapters 21-30 And if not, you should be! Go now!).

3.) Daydreaming…about riding in the silver Volvo with Edward. And pulling over. And climbing in the backseat. And….well, you get the picture.

4.) Talking about the Saga to anyone who will listen (Just ask SW—we barely talk about anything non-Twilight related these days!)

5.) Googling (from my Twilight Google homepage) anything I can think of (Robert Pattinson pics, Rob Pattinson hair, wet Rob Pattinson, Rob Pattinson button-fly jeans…what?)

6.) Visiting Edward at FYE in the mall. (He always stares at me so seductively…)

7.) Spending any leftover time visiting my fav Twilight blogs and websites


As you can see, I have found quite a few things to keep me busy while DH is at work during the day. (And I do mean pretty much all day, every day!) I’m beginning to worry though. Each day I get closer and closer to the day where I have to go back to work and I’m starting to wonder….how will I EVER have enough time to get my Twilight fix during the school year?? I don’t know if the evenings alone will cut it anymore...


Time to get creative. I’m going to have to fill this Twidiculous void whenever I have a free moment. For starters, I’m thinking I need to hang a Robward poster on the door to the supply closet. (On the inside people! Then, when I need a moment away from the kids I can just step inside and stare at him. Is that creepy? And am I brave enough to explain it to my assistant teacher and aides??) ) I guess I can try to read during my lunch break. Sadly, my classroom doesn’t even have internet due to budget cuts, so internet-related activities will all have to be reserved for home time. Tiny E and B can come to school with me some days…I’ll just have to make sure they stay hidden out of the kids' sight (and out of the reach of their sticky little hands!)


How do you working Twidiculous ladies do it? Any suggestions?

PS: Can I just mention again how much we LOVE our button from the fantastic Betti.Music.Twilight ?!! I'm still working on getting DH to put on the glitter...

Saturday Sparklers

The weekly round up:

Check out this airport crisis deverted at We Bite Pretty Hard.

I wish I had a boss this cool. Read about it at Twitarded.

Go NOW and watch the videos. NOW. Ramblings of A Latchkey Wife.

Smutty fanfic that will make you wish Edward Cullen deflowered you. Making Mrs. Cullen.

~SW

Read It!

The following links are for pieces of fan fiction. Evidently, there are a lot of people out there even more obsessed then us and can't handle that the books are over, so they write their own stories about the Twilight characters. I was a little reluctant to read anything, because there is some weird stuff out there, but both of these are really good.

This one is an extension of Midnight Sun, all in Edward's perspective. Awesome:http://twilighted.net/viewstory.php?sid=4146&textsize=0&chapter=1

This one is really short, but it's from Jasper's view after he loses Bella at the airport in Phoenix:
http://twilighted.net/viewstory.php?sid=5546

Hope you like them!

~SW